To: Mom From: Daughter; Now Can I Have a Cell Phone?

Parenting a preteen girl can be so challenging at times.  More to come on that subject…but for today: having my preteen girl is such a blessing.  Monday night my to-do list was packed-down to the minute, and to make it even more challenging, Nathan was working out of town that night and wouldn’t be able to help with the duties needing to be done at home. Fun stuff.  Fortunately I don’t have many days like this, and at the end when all is done, there is a nice sense of accomplishment.  And gratitude that it’s over and that I made it out with everyone still in one piece. 

I had one child’s dance class, parent teacher conferences at the middle school (which is show up at your convenience and stand in line for each teacher your child has. It’s a bit annoying for someone like me who likes to know I will be starting my conferences at 7pm and I will finish at 7:43pm. But I completely understand why they do it this way-and actually it IS better than trying to schedule 5 different conferences!) I also had to fit in feeding everyone, bathing my youngest two and getting everyone in bed on time.  Yes, getting everyone in bed on time IS on the daily schedule.  It’s a must.  Not necessarily for them.  It’s a must-that’s worth repeating.  Just for the record, I know that I CAN let my little two go to bed without a bath on busy, daddy-less nights and they won’t be damaged.  This does happen here. They had school the next morning so a bath was imperative. 

Back to the story…I had planned on cooking dinner earlier in the day and just warming it up when it came time to feed everyone.  However, after exercise class, errands, groceries, cleaning out the pantry and refrigerator (LONG OVERDUE) so that I could put the groceries away, I ran out of time to cook.  And, there’s always Sonic, right?

After dance class, the girls and I grabbed dinner at the drive thru and ate it in the car on the way home.  After getting them settled in at home, explaining again for the 257^th time the “Rules When Mom is Gone,” I left the oldest in charge and headed off to conferences. 

The line for the one teacher I was most anxious to see (Middle School Math-EEK!!) was also the one EVERY other parent in the building needed to visit with as well.  I was smart though and thought I’d just zip around to the other 4 conferences first, since their lines were short, and by the time I was finished with them the crowd at the Math teacher would be non-existent and I’d breeze on through!  Yep. Didn’t quite go as I planned.  Shocking.  I was now last in that long line. 

I finished the conferences a happy mom and proud of my first-year middle schooler.  All A’s & 1 B (sheesh, that middle school Math!! We're totally happy with the B though!)  Up next on the agenda was the bathing of the babes, putting them all to bed and then cleaning up the messes in the kitchen and living room-but just ever so slightly.  The Mr. was not coming home so I was off the hook there.

When I arrived home, breathing in deeply trying to catch my second (or eighth) wind to finish the tasks at hand, I entered into what was quite possibly the closest thing to Heaven on Earth.  The two littles heard me come in and came running to greet me.  They were BATHED! There’s no sweeter smell! Especially when someone else does it!  And yes, I did smell… to make sure they had not just sat playing in a tub of water.  They smelled glorious. Their hair had been blow-dried and brushed.  They were in their pajamas.  I was overjoyed.  As I pushed past them to find my big girl so that I could bow down at her feet in gratitude, I notice that my kitchen is clean.  And so is the living room.  My duties awaiting me had been done, every one.  I can’t even come close to explaining in words how excited, grateful, relieved, proud and in love with my daughter I was at that moment.  She’s awesome. Having a preteen is THE GREATEST THING IN THE WORLD!!!! (remind me tomorrow that I said that.)

As I was expressing to her all of these afore-mentioned praises, she interrupts me to say “Is THIS going ‘above and beyond’?” Her daddy told her one way that she could show responsibility and maturity (the characteristics that must be in place for her to “FINALLY” get a cell phone like “ALL OF HER OTHER FRIENDS!”) was by going above and beyond her normal, expected responsibilities.  So, there was a motive.  But I’m totally okay with that! 

As we are entering the preteen years, there are so many stresses, worries, insecurities as a parent...but then there are also days like this that I am so thankful to be blessed with a preteen girl. 

July Summer Fun in AR

Every year we try to go home to Arkansas for the 4th of July.  We have a long-standing tradition of spending the 4th on Lake DeGray.  This year, Nathan had to spend the entire week following the 4th at the Nat'l Guard Base so the girls and I just stayed in Arkansas and had some fun with family there.  Since looking at pictures is ALWAYS more fun than just reading, here is our 10 day trip in pictures! :)

Spending the 4th of July on Lake DeGray with my parents, brother, sister-in-law and nephews!  We love the lake...

Tubing is one of the kid's most favorite things to do.  Here are my 4 getting ready to ride.

Emma, getting ready to ride with Uncle Tommy.

Never short on silliness! He's making sure it's a fun ride...even if there's not much wake to bounce them around

 We like to float around and relax too.  And act goofy. All the time. 

 Macy and Landon getting ready to ride with Tommy & Lesley.

...I love this one!

And I love this one too. Nothing like the rocking waves, warm sunshine, and the lull of the boat motor to put you right out!

Sweet cousin love! But only for a few seconds.  The moment he realized her arm was on his back, it was OVER. :)

Lots of fun was had at the lake.  Later that night we went back out on the boat to watch the firework show.  By that time we were all exhausted.  Taylor & Emma stayed at the camper with Nana & Papaw and the rest of the crew.  Nathan, our two little girls, and I headed back to his parent's house to spend the night.  Very fortunate that they don't live too far away from the lake!! 

Next up, we decided to go climb Pinnacle Mountain.  I wasn't sure what to expect so I made arrangements for mom to take care of Macy.  When Emma heard me say we're going to "climb a mountain" she promptly informed me that she was NOT climbing a mountain.  So she too spent the day with Nana.  Here we are with Nathan's mom, Meme, about to climb the mountain behind us.

She's ready...

He's become accustomed to carrying pink items.  We like pink at our house.  A lot. He is not ashamed.  I did offer to carry it but he must've been feeling chivalrous...wouldn't let me carry it.  It was heavy...3 large bottles of water, first aid kit, snacks... 

Addison was a trooper! She led the way almost all the way up. Nathan and I took turns keeping up with her the whole time.

 

The views on the way up were beautiful...

And the climb got steeper and a trickier! We didn't expect to be actually climbing up rocks. We thought there would be a nice dirt path all the way.  Pssh!! 

Turns out, we took a wrong turn at some point and ended up climbing these rocks straight up when we should've been on more of a path.  Still a rocky path, but more of a horizontal climb than this vertical one.  We found that OTHER path on our way down, thank the good Lord. I was getting nervous about having to come back down these rocks!

We made it to the top and it was absolutely beautiful.  And we were quite proud of ourselves for making it all the way up and living to tell about it. 

(Yes, we're missing Meme.  She made it almost to the top, but when we got to where the rocks were more jagged and steep, she decided to sit and wait on us to come back down.)

The Arkansas River as seen from the top of Pinnacle Mtn.

We made it back down the mountain and then went to eat Mexican food in celebration of our awesomeness. We'll use any reason to celebrate with a Mexican food feast! 

 I found this one among our "Arkansas" pictures and it has nothing to do with our trip, but...Are these not the most fabulous eyelashes you've ever seen?? People pay good money for lashes like these.  She will love them one day.  Or not even care about things like eyelashes...

(She'll thank me one day for showing the drool bubble.  I'm sure of it!)

A few days later, Mom and I took the girls to Branson, MO to play.  I was forbidden to visit the outlet malls.  We won't say WHO put his foot down on the shopping...but I think we all know who it was!  Uuhhumm, NATHAN! ;)  We found a place that had an indoor and outdoor water park attached to it so we stayed and played there.  The girls had a great time.  They love water.

We also took them to see the Dixie Stampede.  They loved it! Addison had a conversation with this guy before going in. 

He told her she could a ride a horse any time.  Just hop on and go.  On the way home, driving through eastern Oklahoma, we passed several farms.  She said "Mama, I need you to stop at the next barn." I was thinking this would be yet another need for a pit stop! Nope, she informed me that she "needed me to stop at the next barn so that she could ride a horse and show me what she could do on it." She liked the trick rider girl a bit too much at the show.  Now she fully believes that not only can she ride a horse, but she can ride it while hanging off the side, upside down.  No lack of confidence with this one.

After we got back to Nana's & Papaw's house, we spent the rest of our time just hanging out with cousins, riding 4-wheelers, and enjoying being in the country! While jumping on the trampoline at Uncle Tommy's and Aunt Lesley's house, Taylor mastered her back handspring! Thanks Aunt Lesley!! Here's the play-by-play... :)    

There were lots of tears on the day we left to return home to Oklahoma. We love Oklahoma, but my kids long to live in the country.  They're country kids being forced to live in the suburbs.  Me too. Maybe one day we'll have the opportunity to return to my roots and live in the country. ...with our 4-wheelers, and our yellow dog, and deer in the front yard. 

One last event that warrants including... (another reason why we long for the excitement of country life)...

On Saturday, Mom and I were cleaning and doing things around the house all morning.  She stopped for a lunch break, taking her sandwich plate out onto the back porch to eat.  She came running back in yelling for me to "come help, the cows are out!"  They were leaving our field and heading straight for the neighbor's field.  Mom ran to get one 4 wheeler as I went the other direction to get another one.  In the process, I see the dog with his front paws on the outdoor table, finishing off the food on Mom's plate! She begins screaming at the dog, but it's too late.  Entire sandwich and whatever else was on the plate, GONE!  Next as I'm coming around the house on the 4 wheeler, I see mom running from the barn (where the other 4 wheeler is) holding her shoulder in pain.  Wasps.  Two stings. She's HIGHLY allergic.  I proceeded into the neighbor's field and after about three rounds, got all but one cow back into our field.  (There's always that ONE! Little HEIFER!!) ;) I left her.  By that time I didn't care if she got back with the rest or not.   Mom had just been stung by a wasp a few days before this and had to go get a shot.  Fortunately the shot lasts a while so she didn't swell up beyond recognition.  Later that day, Tommy and I went out looking for that cow that wouldn't cooperate.  At some point in the afternoon, I guess she decided to jump the fence and return to her friends because when we checked on them, there she was.  Heifer!

A Scheduled Summer (Whaaattt??)

I find myself having to REMIND myself (is that in a rap song? If not, it should be!) often that my children are not me.  They don't like the same things I liked as a child and they don't have the same behaviors, personality, mannerisms, etc. that I had as a child.  Weird, huh, since they are PART ME. 

During my childhood summers I did not want ANY kind of schedule or routine in any way, shape, or form.  I was plenty fine to just free play all day-OUTSIDE, eat when I got hungry, sit in the shade or go inside when I got hot and tired. I usually did have a few things my Mama would tell me I needed to do that day around the house.  But I chose when I did them, and that was fine, so long as it was done by the time she got home from work. So I usually took care of it about 20 minutes before she was to arrive home. :) 

My children, on the other hand, want a daily schedule.  Knowing this, I made one on the last day of school and posted it on our family board so that it would be ready come summer vacation day 1.  It looked liked this:

MORNING:

Workbook

1 hour Screen Time

Activity (pool, park, craft, etc)

AFTERNOON:

Reading & Quiet Time

Chores

1 hour Screen Time

Simple, no time constraints that I would have to enforce, just a daily guideline that they could follow.  After day 1, I knew this would not work for them.  ALL DAY LONG I fielded the questions "What time do we do X?! Isn't it time for X?!! Maaaammaaaa! When do we need to start X?!" 

It was completely and totally EXHAUSTING!!

What is WRONG  with these children!?! They are SO NOT MINE!!  Must be their father...his genes.  They surface from time to time and I have to either try to FIX that behavior PRONTO or I have to re-adjust my thinking.  Let me just say though, contrary to what it may sound like (I whine & belly-ache some times) I am so very thankful that they take after him when it comes to being in a strict routine, their diligence in school work and reading, and their desire to always be on time.  Those qualities are not mine.  Although it does help things run so much smoother if I try to be more like that! So I try. Sometimes.

Now our schedule has times set to each task, right down to the "Eat Breakfast" time of day.  It is working for them.  They like it.  (They're so strange!!) They are keeping to that schedule like no body's business! It's awesome, really.  They are doing their Summer Bridge workbook pages, working on them for almost an hour! They are doing all of their chores and reading at least 20-30 minutes every day too.  Even Addison!! (Yep! My kids ROCK!)

It does help that there is an incentive attached to them doing their required activities.  They have a "daily check-off" chart where they place a mark each day that they finish their workbook, reading and chores.  At the end of the week (Saturday), if every square is checked, they get a special treat.  This past Saturday we took them all to the theater to see the movie Epic.  They loved it! Score 1 for Mama, and 1 for the kids!  

Now we've started week 2 and today has been GREAT!! Taylor even did extra chores (loaded dishwasher, hand washed all the extra dishes that didn't fit, swept kitchen floor) just to ensure that there would be NOTHING, short of this crazy Oklahoma weather, that would stop us from going to the pool this afternoon.  She's great.  And now I have added "POOL" to our afternoon agenda for today! 

To be completely honest, I was dreading summer a little bit.  Well, a lot actually.  Not because I don't like having my children home every day, ALL DAY...EEEEK!!...but because I just REALLY enjoyed having a few hours a couple days a week with no children.  Days that I could spend grocery shopping, shopping-shopping, "mental health" days, etc...ahhh they were NICE!  But I have to say, although we're only a week into it, this summer is turning out to be pretty good.  Now if we can just keep it going like this, I might just make it to mid-August will all my hair, no new grays (psshhh who cares-they can be covered!), and what little bit of sanity I've managed to hang on to, LEFT! :)

New Look, Tired Mama

I'm reluctant to say that I'm back or that I'm going to start posting again, as the last time I did that, I posted like once and then was gone again for quite some time.  Sorry blog world...blame Facebook and our need for short, quick, to the point updates! So I'm just gonna pick right up like I've never been gone.

There's a new look here now.  Since spring arrived, (TIME-wise, not weather wise, I should say) I have a new obsessive addiction to all things mint and turquoise colored. And navy. And watermelon. Some coral too.  I thought maybe if I incorporated some of my new favorite colors into my blog, I might visit it more often.  We'll see.

This week has been insane at our house.  (Maybe that's another reason why I decided to work on the blog today. Subconsciously. *See "About" tab for explanation on that one.) Normally I'm fairly organized (or like to think I am) and have everything somewhat planned out.  But this week, I really don't know where my brain has been.  I've been in a fog. (I blame the hormones.) It's been a "last minute, forgot to buy eggs, fly by the seat of my pants, 'you need WHAT?! WHEN?!'" crappy kind of week.    We've had a doctor visit for one child, teacher appreciation week activities-between all 4 children we have 7 teachers that we appreciate VERY much, Science project due, mother's day gifts/cards to plan/buy/mail, although this year that was a little easier, thank you sister-in-law :), Science Museum field trip tonight. Those things were on top of our regular weekly errands and activities.  Add to that, my little ones have been quite quarrelsome, defiant, and WHINEY this week-their preschool teachers say that they all have spring fever-tylenol and motrin do not work for this, however benadryl seems to help. (KIDDING!!)  To say that I'm READY FOR THIS WEEK TO ENNNNNDDDD would be the understatement of the year! Plus, I forgot that today was the last MOPS meeting.  Didn't go.  Didn't even remember it until I got a text from a friend acknowledging my absence.  I'm WINNING this week!

I'm sure my busyness and stress is part of the cause of the children's behavior.  Feeding off of my stressful behavior. Even Taylor got a little out of kilter.  Last night at 10:57pm I was awakened by punches to my shoulder (she has learned to punch at me from a distance, as I tend to be startled by and swing at subjects who hover over me and gently try to wake me).  She was fully dressed for school, hair done, shoes on, ready to go.  She said panicky "MOM! What time is it?! Why aren't you getting dressed?!" I looked at the clock and told her "It's 10:57! 11 o'clock AT NIGHT! What are you doing?!"  She kept looking at me and back at the clock confused. I finally convinced her that it was still night time and she needed to disrobe and go back to bed.  

Some time around 4:00 am, I am awakened again by a strange sound.  After getting up thinking it's one of the kids up doing something, I finally figure out it is some weird snore coming from the Mr. in bed next to me. He got a push. But he didn't notice.  4:40am, alarm goes off. Boot camp time! Sheesh...I sure am glad I don't have infants any more that keep me up at night! 

Here's to a CALM, SLEEP IN ON SATURDAY, RESTFUL weekend! Keep saying it to myself and believing it will happen, and it will come to pass. Isn't that what that TV preacher says will happen?! ;)