Tank you fo spenning time wid me today!

Well, we've made it back from our visit to Arkansas. We had a great time! You'll be pleased to know that I did not have one single panic attack on the air crafts. (thank you...thank you). Although I did cry out to God on more than twelve occasions. Ironically, the page of my bible study book that I started reading on the first plane before take-off told of the author's fear of flying and how she had a terrible experience on an airplane once (our similarities were strangely coincidental-or not). She talked about how nervous she was when having to fly again and how when she began to panic and become afraid (during turbulence - which I totally don't get...when the wind is blowing around my car as I'm driving down the interstate, it doesn't send me bouncing too and fro. How is it that wind has "bumps" in it??...anyway) she would close her eyes and say "Dear God, please help!" She said it gave her comfort and peace and seemed to make the turbulence not so scary anymore. So I thought I'd give it a try. By George, it worked! And I should know. As I said before, I cried out (silently of course, as to not totally freak out those sitting around me) too many times to count. And each time, the turbulence seemed to pass quickly. God is good! The day we left to come back to Florida was a nasty, rainy day. Big dark clouds in the sky. Can you say TURBULENCE?? ~Dear God, please help me!!! Before we were able to board our plane to return home, we were informed that there would be a slight (hour and a half!!) delay due to a maintenance problem. "Say what?!" I think they said something like part of the wing had fallen off. Or maybe that was just what I made out of the statement "A minor piece of plastic has come loose on the wing and will not be anything major or time consuming to repair." Needless to say, I was not a happy camper. It's one thing to be nervous, go through the security check, get to our gate, take the girls to pee one last time (because I don't care that there are restrooms on the plane...I'm pretty positive that if I remove myself from my seat I will upset the entire balance of the plane and we will take a nose dive! So there are absolutely NO BATHROOM BREAKS while in flight.), then board, take off, boom...no backing out, it's done, no time to even think about what I'm fixing to do. It's another thing, however, to make me sit for an hour and a half watching the rain pour in knowing that some poor mechanic is out there freezing trying to FIX our plane so that we can take off. (Was he doing a good, efficient job or just trying to hurry and get out of that weather?) That, I almost couldn't handle. Thank God my kids were wired and bouncing off the walls in the terminal (Thank you for those Skittles, Nana!) so that I was having to corral them the entire time. Making threats that they knew I couldn't keep being that there was an audience around. So that helped to keep me busy. Finally, we could board the plane. Our seats were in the 6th row...comforting NOT hearing the engines on this flight. (We sat on top of an engine on our way up there.) Sitting in the five rows ahead of us were a group of black ladies from a church taking some kind of church affiliated trip. They were reading their Bibles and from what I could see, notes on "Religion in the world today" and some were praying because "Cuh-laud, they was nur-vis 'bout dis flyin mess!" Somehow, they were comforting to me. Then, there was our middle-aged Asian flight attendant who doubles as the in-flight comedian. We flew with the same crew the first flight and she was incredibly sweet and even let both of the girls say "Happy Thanksgiving!" over the PA once we'd landed. But this day, she was on a roll! She began with all the pre-flight announcements telling us about where we were going, the souvenirs they offered for purchase, etc...And then she begins to tell us about all the safety info. we need to know. First was the oxygen masks. She says..."In dee e-vant dat dee aiwcwaft looses pres-shuh, you will see deese funny wooking tings fall fwom dee compahtment above you head. Stop scweaming, and pull it down ovuh you mout. If you ah seated nex to a chile or someone acting like a chile, secuah dee mask on you self firs den secure dair mask fo dem." I was so grateful for the laugh at that moment. It helped to calm me down a little. Next she said "In dee e-vant dat you-uh aiwliner decide to become a cwuise linew, you will fin dee instwuctions for using you seat as a fwoatation device on dee cahd in dee seat in fwont of you. Fo dose of you who have a emotional connection to you cell pone, you MUST TURN IT OFF NOW! Take it A WAY from you ear and put it in dee OFF position!" Next came "Okay people, heeah come dee part you ahh all waiting for. Dee take off! Kis, put you hands up in dee air...heeah we go! I pwetty sure dis aiwcwaft is fastew dan any ting you have in you garage. It go zero to 60 in t minus one second!" By this time I didn't even care that we were taking off. I was crying from laughing so hard at her. If you could've just heard the accent with the sarcasm! Those were just a few comments that I could remember. She was FULL of them! At the end of the flight she came on again and said "Okay, fo dose of you having cell pone wid dwawals, you may NOW tun you pones BACK ON! Tank you fo fwying wid us on Allegian Air." And with that, we were free to get off!!! PRAISE THE LORD AND PASS THE GRAVY!

While we were there, Nathan and I hunted almost every day. I hunted with him some and also with my dad some too. We had a lot of fun even though neither of us killed anything and I missed the biggest buck of my life. Shot twice at him and still missed both times. He was too far away for me. I didn't judge the distance correctly through the scope. But even with that small disappointment, it was still so much fun. There is something about getting up and out on that deer stand before the world around you starts stirring. It's so peaceful. Then gradually as the sun rises everything comes to life and is so beautiful! I so hope that you will, at some time in your life, take the opportunity to get outside in the woods and witness the nature around you as it awakens for the day and be able to see and experience all of the amazing things that God has created for us to enjoy here on this earth. It is awesome! We were able to see a lot of deer and watch them as they ate and played together. One set of adult does came out with a baby and were eating the corn that we'd put out for them. Nathan whispered to me "That's two girlfriends out for breakfast together and one had to bring along their kid." Ha! I watched as one doe got a little too close to the other's food and that other one reared up and started kicking her on the back with both of its front hooves. It was hard not to laugh out loud. During the time spans of not seeing any deer, Nathan and I would whisper and talk about things. We also played "Would you have dated me if I looked like this?" and made funny, deformed faces at each other. I had my glasses on so I could really make him laugh! I also did a lot of text messaging to my dad and brother as they sat on their stands too. Isn't modern technology great?! Normally I would've felt like spending 5 mornings and 4 afternoons on a deer stand with no kill a colossal waste of my time. However this year I didn't feel that way. For the first time I was really able to appreciate spending that time with Nathan and with my Dad. And also getting to see all of those deer and watch them as they went about doing what they do. One afternoon a cold front was pushing its way through and the whole state was under a tornado watch and our county was under a thunderstorm warning and where were we? Of course, the faithful hunters were on the deer stand hoping that the cooler air would cause the big bucks to move and we'd finally have the chance to take one. I began to get a little concerned once the lightning started streaking to the ground all around us and the thunder got closer. So, not wanting to leave the woods, we decided to get out of the metal "tree" that we were sitting in and pull the vehicle up under our stand so that we could still shoot out the window in the event a shooter came out. Just as we'd pulled the vehicle in place, the down pour hit. Then came the marble sized hail! I said "We must be crazy...no deer is going to come out in this!" And yet I had to eat my words. Just as I was talking to Dad on the phone letting him know what we were doing and asking about the weather, a buck walks out about 100 yards from us. I dropped my cell phone to my lap and awkwardly positioned my rifle out the window. Unfortunately he was not quite big enough to harvest this year. I was just amazed that he was standing there eating corn and getting hailed on! The rain and hail were coming in my window and my one leg on that side was getting pelted. Not long after, the rain stopped and the cold wind started blowing. It started getting too dark to shoot anything so we left, not too disappointed about the day. It had been rather interesting.

Spending so much time with the grandparents, my girls were quite rotten by the end of the week! It's funny to watch them work the grandparents over. They can play on their sympathies and get them to do things they'd never even consider doing for their own children at that age! Even at just under three years old, Emma has gotten it down pat! She went into town with my Dad one afternoon. He had to go to his office for a minute and then to the parts store. She told me "Papaw wet me wide in da fwont seat with him, ha-ha-haha-ha!" Before I went berserk, Mom told me that she was strapped in to her car seat. ~but still in the front seat, no less!! I gave dad a look and said "I guess when you ARE the law, you don't have to OBEY the law?!!" He didn't pay any attention to what I'd said. ~typical! Anyway, when they left the parts store, she told my dad "Papaw, me not got no toys." "You don't have any toys, he said?" "No, me not got ANY!" She was trying her best to get him to stop off by walmart and buy her some toys. ha! He knew better...or was afraid to take her in walmart for fear she'd embarrass him if he didn't buy her what she wanted. Being the sheriff in a small town he was bound to know about every person in the store. So she came home empty handed but still feeling quite accomplished that she'd ridden in the front seat and she made sure I knew about it too!

On Saturday, we went to a family reunion. It was at a church and next to the church was a big cemetery. As Taylor and her Papaw Bill were walking in she said to him pointing to the cemetery "Look at all those people, Papaw." He said sadly "Yeah, there's a bunch." To which she knowingly and frankly replied "Yep, they're dead." Ha!

With the suggestion (or more like mandate) of Dad, we have decided for this to be an annual trip now. ~flying to AR for the Thanksgiving holidays. So I have a whole year to prepare myself for my next flight. I can most definitely say that I will probably have an entire library of self-help books by then. :) The one that will be most helpful to me though will be the one titled Dear God, Please Help!

Here is a picture of me with that deer that I missed. Turns out that the day he decided to show himself again, Dad was sitting in the right place at the right time and was able to take him. He actually let the deer walk off, back into the woods, hoping that it would come out on Nathan and I as we were hunting just a few hundred yards through the woods. When he came back out, Dad was able to get a good look at him and could count the 14 points he had and he just couldn't let him go again. I don't blame him! Nathan and I don't know HOW he let him walk by the first time. I have a good daddy! (Don't laugh at the orange jumpsuit I'm wearing. I know, it probably DID come off of one of Dad's inmates but it sure did keep me warm! Nathan said I looked like an orange teletubby! ~he was right!)

My Traumatic Day

What a day...and it is not even over yet. Any of you that know me very well know that I am a fraidy cat. A BIG one! I have been known to nearly jump on someones back (Hope-when we were walking together one day) when hearing a dog bark at me from out of nowhere. I've left fingerprints and possibly nail impressions on people at the slightest unexpected noise. I'm pretty sure I've nearly taken off an arm of a really good friend (Deana) on more than one occasion. It does not take much to frighten me. I used to try to be a brave person and to try to prove that to myself ~I once even rode one of those vertical acceleration rides. It's like dyslexic bungee jumping. You strap yourself and another brave friend into this cage that is being held to the ground by a large claw. The operator pushes a button and the bungee cords that are attached to both sides of your cage start to tighten. They pull and tighten to the height of their elastabilities and then the operator pulls a lever which releases the claw that is holding your butt to the ground. All of sudden you are "vertically accelerating" high into the air...up above the crowds below...so high that you can almost see God himself and all the Heavenly angels. Or maybe that part was just my imagination as I'm pretty sure that was as close to death as I'd ever felt. Anyhoo, once you fly up as high as your bungee cords will let you, you begin your decent back to Earth. So this is the part where I'm thinking "Praise God and Everything that is Holy! This is almost over!" But no. Once we again reach the extent of the bungee's capabilities, we go shooting back up into the air. We bounce there for several minutes, most of the time upside down, mind you, until finally the operator thinks we've had enough and he begins to lower our cage back to the ground. Once our butts were clamped to the ground again, our friendly little operator informed us that the entire event had been videoed. Yes, complete with my blood curdling screams and all. So I'm thinking it could be nice to have that video. You know, to prove my braveness to others. To show them the dangerous things that I'm capable of forcing myself to do. Then we get the kicker. You can only purchase the video if you go on the ride again, paying for another round. My partner in gallantry pipes up and says "Sure, we'll do it again!" However by the time he (yes, he~my best friend wouldn't go with me and my own boyfriend wouldn't go on it either so I rode it with my friend's beau while she and mine watched from the ground.) got the words out of his mouth, I was already clambering out of that thing! We went through much deliberation, him, the operator and myself and once they saw that there was nothing they could say or do to entice me to go again, the operator (in obvious disgust) agreed to give him the video if someone else would ride it with him. So another poor, valiant-attempting soul got on with him and up they went. Needless to say, I think that was probably the last time I FORCED myself to be indomitable. ~like that word? I LOVE the thesaurus! Isn't it great how it can take plain ordinary words and make them so sophisticated and superior. (In case you're wondering, here's how the Encarta dictionary defines "indomitable" -'brave, determined, and impossible to defeat or frighten.') ~So me at that moment I was paying for my ticket to defy death.
Okay, so back to my day...(thanks for chasing that rabbit with me~the jest of that last paragraph: I am such a pansy!)...Tomorrow is our MOPS meeting at church and we're doing a Thanksgiving theme, for apparent reasons. So I was in Wal-Mart grocery shopping and buying everything I needed to prepare some of the food. I was looking at the whole turkey breasts and much to my disappointment, they were ALL frozen. Who knew that a turkey breast takes 24-48 hours just to THAW!?? So I'm beginning to get worried as I'm digging through the turkeys hoping to find just one that isn't completely frozen solid. Finally, after getting frostbite on my nose and fingers, I give up. When I crawl out of the freezer bin of turkeys, an elderly lady is standing there looking at me. She has halted her grocery shopping to watch me. As I begin to pass by her, ever aware of her standing there staring at me and wondering why, she says "Honey, there are more turkeys down there in the other bin if you want another brand." I said, "Well, no, I don't care about the brand. They're all frozen!" I'm looking at her in utter confusion as if to say 'the gall of people to freeze all of the birds!' Now not only am I looking dazed and confused but so is she. Only she's directing it at ME. Then, in all seriousness, she says, "Well what did you expect to get, A LIVE BIRD!?" As I saw it, at that moment I had a couple of choices to make. Tell the old lady that I didn't appreciate her sarcasm in my time of need OR just laugh and say, I'll go look in that other bin. Of course, I chose the latter. She wished me good luck and walked away shaking her head. I'm sure saying to herself "Ughh, women these days. Don't have the sense God gave a goose!"
To my defense I DID, in fact, find the whole turkey breasts that were not frozen! They were in the fresh meats section. So humph! ONWARD TO CONQUER THE ROASTING!
As if I didn't seem crazy enough in that last encounter, the Lord saw fit to make me look even nuttier before I could exit the store. This time, I was in the check out line. So proud of myself that I'd found my birds and all the other fixin's I needed. I've unloaded the cart and am now reaching over into the empty cart to put in my bags when I see this THING jump at me from inside of my cart. Of course, I scream and jump 10 feet in the air. Once I landed, I saw that the "thing" was a LIZARD in my cart!! Now, my cashier is standing there holding her heart with both hands, eyes bugging out and breathing heavy. I'm pretty sure I just sent her half way to a coronary...maybe a little closer. She says "Lady, what is the matter with you?!" Still shaking from my reptile encounter I yell, "There's a lizard in my cart!!!" Again I got my second head shake for the day as she muttered "hoah, Lord!" She didn't even help me to extract him from my buggy either. Actually I think she was still trying to recover and finish ringing me up so that she could get me out of there. But I digress...so I pushed my cart out in front of me and tried to shake and shoo the thing off. FINALLY it decided to jump onto the floor but it didn't move after that. It just sat there right in front of my cart. I just knew if I pushed my cart an inch I would run over it and squash it. There is nothing more disgusting to me than squashing an animal ~ and I imagined that squishing that lizard would be similar to squishing a frog. Eeeewww...So I stood there waiting on it to come back to life and run away. Finally, after some foot stomping, it did and I proceeded to leave the store. Much to my cashier's relief, I'm sure.
Not long after that I was faced with a decision to make. One that both excited me immensely and terrified me at the same time. After a little prodding and negotiating from my father, Nathan and I had decided to entertain the thought of flying home, oops!, to AR. I was really excited about getting to go spend Thanksgiving with our families and getting to deer hunt with Nathan and my Dad but OH CRAP! I'm gonna have to get on an airplane! I'm not a flyer. I once could've been, but a near death experience on a plane once traumatized me so that I shudder at even the thought of it. (Okay, I know what you're thinking, "Man, she sure has a lot of 'near deathness' in her life. Maybe the ungodly turbulence wasn't a near death experience, per say, but in my mind, I thought I was going to die on that plane. The turbulence was so bad that everyone else on the plane screamed too! Not just me! :) So based on the setting and surroundings and the kind of turbulence we were experiencing...it was a near death experience. If not from the pilots losing control and crashing, then from my own heart failure.) BACK TO THE ISSUE AT HAND! It took me most of the afternoon (and tons of prayers) to finally click on that button to purchase our tickets online. I had filled in every blank, checked off everything to be checked off and was sitting at that final screen. I'd leave the room, come back and look at it, leave again, went to pick Taylor up at school and came back...button still there waiting to be clicked. As I sat there staring at it, I was shaken back to reality by my cell phone ringing. It was Nathan. "Have you done it yet??" "No, not yet." "What are you waiting on?" "I'm scared." "Are you kidding me? Buy the tickets already!" "Uggghhhhh, CLICK." Oh no, I did it. I'm committed now. Shoot! I had done it. I was exhausted. It took a lot out of me to click on that button. My fate's in God's hands now, I thought. (As if it weren't already.)
As the afternoon has gone on and prayers for peace have gone up, I've finally settled down now and I'm getting okay with it. I don't know if it's fatigue that's helping me get over it or if I'm realizing how ridiculous I am. Probably a little of both. A lot of the latter, actually. You know, I really don't know why I have such a hard time putting my faith in God for protection and my well-being. I have no trouble with faith in other areas. Last dime in the checkbook, no worries, God will provide. Making a Thanksgiving dinner for over 50 people, no worries, God will help me get it done. Flying through the air in a jet fuel propelled hunk of metal, NOPE! That's where the line is drawn; that's beyond His jurisdiction! ...Nothing could be more false. At the Women of Faith conference this past weekend, Patsy Clairmont spoke about her fears of flying to another country and she told about several other things that she "doesn't do" and about all of her different fears. The entire time I was thinking "this lady is me in 40 years!" But she went on to say that she DID do those things and she had to trust in the Lord for her protection and for strength. She had to put one foot in front of the other and step out in faith and face her fears so that she could overcome them. So I prayed with her and asked God to help me to put one foot in front of the other and face the fears that keep me from enjoying all of the pleasures of life that he's given to us. When I prayed that prayer I had no idea I would be sticking my toes out so soon! Lorda mercy, that was quick! We fly out on Sunday. THIS COMING Sunday! I bought a bible study book at the conference called 'Overcoming Fear'. I'll be sleeping with it for the next 4 nights. ;-)
Say a prayer for me.

Where have you been???

I know! It's been too long since my last post. I'm feeling the effects of the lack of blogger therapy. I've been quite scattered lately. (Yes, more than usual!!) It's been a whirlwind of a past couple weeks it seems. I've had many moments of "I need to go write this on my blog" but was never able to find a few minutes (or 60) to sit alone and write. ~put the girls in bed early tonight so that I could spend a little while on the psychiatric couch of my blog (which happens to be a not-so-densely cushioned desk chair...good thing I've got that extra padding down there! ~knew it must be there for a reason.) and pour out my thoughts.

Since my last post, Nathan took a week long trip to Costa Rica. It was an incentive trip that Mercury awarded some of their top customers and he got to go along with those customers of his that earned it. (So tough, you know?) He got to stay at a little resort right off the coast in the rain forest. And it rained the biggest part of their trip but the rain didn't stop them from doing all that they had planned. He got to go on a couple of guided fishing trips and zip-lined through the canopy of the rain forest. He took our video camera with him and I had given him specific instructions that he WAS TO FILM THE ZIP LINING EXPERIENCE!! NO MATTER WHAT! He was a little concerned about trying to hold a camera and hold on to his harness and cables but again, I told him NO MATTER WHAT-GET THE VIDEO! (Since I would absolutely NEVER do anything like that I realize that I have to live vicariously through him as he does these dangerous, death defying things that I know most certainly would cause my demise!) He minded very well and got some great shots...one of nothing but his face as he careened through the trees heading for the platform at the end of his line. As I watched his expressions of pure excitement and funness gleaming through his smiles and "Whoas", I could only imagine what my face might have looked like at that moment. I believe it would've been something akin to sheer terror and regret and most definitely accompanied by shrill screams that would make even the sloths get up and run. Speaking of sloths, he was able to film a couple different ones as he waited his turn on the "launch pads". ~Really cool! Because of the where this small, isolated resort was located, they had to take a toy airplane to fly in to it and they landed on a dirt strip in the middle of this village of shack houses. On one side of the landing strip were the shacks and on the other was a cemetery. ~interesting, huh?! I would've killed over from a heart attack before we could've ever landed if I'd seen that. Or actually, I would've never made it that far...seeing the model airplane that he flew on probably would've been enough to send me over the edge. But I digress... He got some beautiful footage while on the plane of the mountains, rain forest and the water. He said that one of the best parts of his trip was a Swedish massage that he got at the spa. THE SPA?!!! It wasn't enough that I had to hear about how wonderful the trip was, and how much fun it was catching these exotic fish, zip-lining through the jungle for crying out loud...NO! He had to rub in that icing on the cake with the massage part. I must be truthful though and not complain too loudly about it because he did say that it was something that I must experience myself, -not taking a trip to Costa Rica!!, a Swedish massage, and that the first chance he gets, he's going to take me to get one. I've never had, nor really wanted, a massage but I hear they can be pretty nice...or to hear him tell it...wuuuunnnnderrrrfullll! I'll let you know what I think about it WHEN I get one. Anyway, he made it back safely on Saturday.
While he was gone I was getting things ready for Mom and Aunt Connie to arrive and preparing to go on a little weekend trip myself. Mom and Connie flew in on Thursday afternoon to babysit my girls while I went to the Women of Faith conference in Tampa Friday night and Saturday. The girls were SO excited about them coming. We'd been counting down the days since the previous Thursday and then the hours on that day. I left on Friday morning with Bridget and we headed across the state to Tampa. We had a great time!! The conference was wonderful. Which if you've ever been to one, you know quite well how great they are. The conf. series they're doing this year has been "Amazing Freedom". Max Lucado was with them and he spoke. Also Anita Renfroe was there. She is the funniest lady I've ever seen! I mean, she is wet-your-pants, cry your eye make-up off funny! In addition to her side-splitting stories and views on life, she also writes songs that finds unbelievable humor in everyday things. Here is a link to a youtube video of her singing one of the songs that she sang for us at the conference. It is a Faith Hill song that she has changed the lyrics to. Run grab a tissue and click here to watch:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3uFRr67Dhic

She also sings the "Mom" song to the William Tell Overture music. That video has been going around on email for a while so you've probably seen it but it's also on youtube if you've not. She sang it for us as well and the lady doesn't even use teleprompters for it. She can remember all those words precisely and spit them out that fast all on her own!! It's amazing. She sang another one called A Salute to Underwire. It was to the music of "You Raise Me Up" by Josh Groban-it's a riot!! Couldn't find it posted anywhere yet. Hopefully someone will put it on youtube soon. Anyway, I had a great time and was really uplifted by all that the speakers shared. If you ever get the opportunity to go to one of their conferences, go...RUN!...you'll love it.
My children were completely rotten when I returned home. Man, give 'em just a couple days with a grandma and WOW at the monsters that are created! (But I wouldn't have it any other way. :-) ~yes, that last statement was for the benefit of Nana and Meme if you're reading this. ;-) ) When I called to check on them Saturday, they had taken their Aunt Connie to see the beach and then had stopped off at Toys 'R Us for two hours (They must be crazy-I try to avoid that place like the plague!!!) and as if T.R.U. wasn't enough, they also made a stop at Wal-Mart. Ever notice how your mother does things for your children that she would've NEVER done for you?! Guess that's part of the joys of being a GRANDma. Spoil 'em rotten, send 'em home to Mama. By later this afternoon they had begun to morph back into their old selves again. Usually doesn't take them too long to figure out ~"Give it up, it doesn't work on the parents." Well, guess it's time for my therapy session to end. I'll try not to wait so long to write again next time. Hope you have a great week! Only 12 days left till the after Thanksgiving Day Sales!! ;-)

"Happy" Halloween...this is how I feel about it too...

Here is just one of the very few pictures I took of the girls in their costumes. As you can see by their faces, they were a little less than enthused about having their picture made. Emma wanted to shed the hat, Taylor wanted to shed the hole blasted, itchy costume! But, I made them stand there and give me their best (fake) smiles, not because I'm such a mean mommy-contrary to their opinion at the moment-but because I KNOW when they're older they will enjoy looking back on their pictures creatively displayed in their scrapbooks and say "Hey, that was the year that I was a xxxx, and mom made us stand there crying in our costumes just so that she could get this picture. Thanks mom, great memories!" Unfortunately I forgot to take their pictures BEFORE we went trick-or-treating so that's part of the reason for the fussiness.

They really did have a fun night. We all did. We went over to Paul & Bridget's house for dinner and then we walked their neighborhood with their little girls, Isabel and Sophia. They got a TON of candy! Lots of chocolate (YES!!-I feel a candy raid coming on!) At a couple of the houses, they gave them whole candy bars!! Not the little bite-sized ones. Yep, I'm thinking we're going to be making trick-or-treating with them an annual event. (Sorry bulging belly & thunder thighs)

The rest of this week has been a blustery cycle of chaos and exhaustion. My poor children have seen "psycho" mom more than I care to disclose. I must be going through that time of the month where it's not THE time of the month but it's getting close. You know the time? When your emotions are a roller coaster ride of rage, happiness, indifference, forgetfulness and sadness. (Well, I can't really attribute my forgetfulness to this "period" of time, that pretty much sticks with me the entire month.) Then add to that just being dog tired as well. Anyway, that's pretty much been my week so far. The mornings this week have been horrendous; trying to get us all dressed and out the door on time. No matter how early I get up or how fast I move, we JUST......CAN'T......GET......OUT......THE......DOOR! And do you think that sometimes when your talking (or barking orders, especially!) that all of a sudden what sounds like plain English to you, comes out as an unknown language to your kids? Like you say "Go brush your teeth, hurry!" and then a few minutes later you find them playing in their rooms, teeth not brushed and now their shoes are off too. It's moments like those that psycho mom appears at our house. I try to suppress her and keep her locked away but after hearing the little angel say "but Mommy, I didn't know you said to brush my teeth" that's when she is out before I can even take another breath. She usually begins with a really ugly frown and her eyes get all beady and look like they could stare a hole through you. Her nice nude complexion turns to splotchy red. Sweat beads form on her upper lip and I'm pretty sure smoke is rising from her head. (Oops, no, it's smoke from the straightening iron she's holding at the base of her scalp...forgetting to pull it through her hair.) Then, she attempts to speak but her lips are curled in and stiff and her teeth just barely open to let the words creep out. The voice starts with a deep, slow utterance of "You'd better get up right this minute and..." Then the interrogative part of her comes out. This part is usually much much louder and higher pitched than then latter and comes immediately afterward, usually in the next breath. It screams "What are you doing? Didn't you hear me say ...?" Among a host of other unanswered questions. It's during this phase that her eyes go from beady to bulging, arms are flailing and the culprit knows for sure that this definitely IS a psycho mom sighting. They stand there, eyes wide, wondering if they should speak or move but afraid to do either. Especially afraid to move for fear that one of the flailing arms will find itself striking their backside. Finally, after a few brief minutes, psycho mom retreats back inside and all that's left is an exhausted, frustrated, singed haired thing. Yes, this happened to me twice this week. I have come to the conclusion that "psycho mom" has a diagnosis and comes from a condition called hormonal genetics. Hormonal being that her feelings of rage and delirium are purely from her premenstrual condition at the time, and genetics because, well, that's the way HER mother handled things like that. (Sorry, Mom! ;-)) Anyway, as He usually does, God let me know that He is so much bigger than my chaos (and yes, it's mine-solely created by me). He shows me that yes, while my little part of the world seems to be in utter confusion and disarray, he is a God of peace and order. On Tuesday morning, after I had unleashed psycho mom, the kids and I were driving to school and Taylor says "Look Mom! It's a rainbow! Isn't it pretty?" It was so beautiful and so peaceful. At that moment I felt God saying to me, "Calm down. Look, you made it to school on time. You weren't late and wouldn't it have been much nicer to have experienced this kind of peace this morning rather than your madness?" I felt really ashamed and guilty for acting the way I had. Did it keep me from doing it again? Well, you'd think it would have but no, this morning, same thing. I unleashed her again. This time once we got into the car and were driving away, Emma says "Mama, wook! God made a wainbow again!" I thought, no way, that's way too coincidental! I look up and there are two perfectly parallel rainbows pretty as you please! I thought to myself, Man, you did it again this morning and here God is showing you that your morning could've (and should've) been much different. And tomorrow, the headlines will read "Florida Skies Painted with Scores of Rainbows!" ;-) ~just kidding. I pray that the next time I start to get bent out of shape and feel psycho mom emerging that God will remind me of the three rainbows and how much better it feels to have His peace than to have all that chaos and anger. I know that all I have to do at that moment of choice is ask Him to give me His peace and he will and how much more pleased with me will he be than if I choose my own way of handling things.

Here is one more picture. One of Emma after Taylor had stomped away. Shows exactly what she thought of my picture taking! :-)