Here is just one of the very few pictures I took of the girls in their costumes. As you can see by their faces, they were a little less than enthused about having their picture made. Emma wanted to shed the hat, Taylor wanted to shed the hole blasted, itchy costume! But, I made them stand there and give me their best (fake) smiles, not because I'm such a mean mommy-contrary to their opinion at the moment-but because I KNOW when they're older they will enjoy looking back on their pictures creatively displayed in their scrapbooks and say "Hey, that was the year that I was a xxxx, and mom made us stand there crying in our costumes just so that she could get this picture. Thanks mom, great memories!" Unfortunately I forgot to take their pictures BEFORE we went trick-or-treating so that's part of the reason for the fussiness.
They really did have a fun night. We all did. We went over to Paul & Bridget's house for dinner and then we walked their neighborhood with their little girls, Isabel and Sophia. They got a TON of candy! Lots of chocolate (YES!!-I feel a candy raid coming on!) At a couple of the houses, they gave them whole candy bars!! Not the little bite-sized ones. Yep, I'm thinking we're going to be making trick-or-treating with them an annual event. (Sorry bulging belly & thunder thighs)
The rest of this week has been a blustery cycle of chaos and exhaustion. My poor children have seen "psycho" mom more than I care to disclose. I must be going through that time of the month where it's not THE time of the month but it's getting close. You know the time? When your emotions are a roller coaster ride of rage, happiness, indifference, forgetfulness and sadness. (Well, I can't really attribute my forgetfulness to this "period" of time, that pretty much sticks with me the entire month.) Then add to that just being dog tired as well. Anyway, that's pretty much been my week so far. The mornings this week have been horrendous; trying to get us all dressed and out the door on time. No matter how early I get up or how fast I move, we JUST......CAN'T......GET......OUT......THE......DOOR! And do you think that sometimes when your talking (or barking orders, especially!) that all of a sudden what sounds like plain English to you, comes out as an unknown language to your kids? Like you say "Go brush your teeth, hurry!" and then a few minutes later you find them playing in their rooms, teeth not brushed and now their shoes are off too. It's moments like those that psycho mom appears at our house. I try to suppress her and keep her locked away but after hearing the little angel say "but Mommy, I didn't know you said to brush my teeth" that's when she is out before I can even take another breath. She usually begins with a really ugly frown and her eyes get all beady and look like they could stare a hole through you. Her nice nude complexion turns to splotchy red. Sweat beads form on her upper lip and I'm pretty sure smoke is rising from her head. (Oops, no, it's smoke from the straightening iron she's holding at the base of her scalp...forgetting to pull it through her hair.) Then, she attempts to speak but her lips are curled in and stiff and her teeth just barely open to let the words creep out. The voice starts with a deep, slow utterance of "You'd better get up right this minute and..." Then the interrogative part of her comes out. This part is usually much much louder and higher pitched than then latter and comes immediately afterward, usually in the next breath. It screams "What are you doing? Didn't you hear me say ...?" Among a host of other unanswered questions. It's during this phase that her eyes go from beady to bulging, arms are flailing and the culprit knows for sure that this definitely IS a psycho mom sighting. They stand there, eyes wide, wondering if they should speak or move but afraid to do either. Especially afraid to move for fear that one of the flailing arms will find itself striking their backside. Finally, after a few brief minutes, psycho mom retreats back inside and all that's left is an exhausted, frustrated, singed haired thing. Yes, this happened to me twice this week. I have come to the conclusion that "psycho mom" has a diagnosis and comes from a condition called hormonal genetics. Hormonal being that her feelings of rage and delirium are purely from her premenstrual condition at the time, and genetics because, well, that's the way HER mother handled things like that. (Sorry, Mom! ;-)) Anyway, as He usually does, God let me know that He is so much bigger than my chaos (and yes, it's mine-solely created by me). He shows me that yes, while my little part of the world seems to be in utter confusion and disarray, he is a God of peace and order. On Tuesday morning, after I had unleashed psycho mom, the kids and I were driving to school and Taylor says "Look Mom! It's a rainbow! Isn't it pretty?" It was so beautiful and so peaceful. At that moment I felt God saying to me, "Calm down. Look, you made it to school on time. You weren't late and wouldn't it have been much nicer to have experienced this kind of peace this morning rather than your madness?" I felt really ashamed and guilty for acting the way I had. Did it keep me from doing it again? Well, you'd think it would have but no, this morning, same thing. I unleashed her again. This time once we got into the car and were driving away, Emma says "Mama, wook! God made a wainbow again!" I thought, no way, that's way too coincidental! I look up and there are two perfectly parallel rainbows pretty as you please! I thought to myself, Man, you did it again this morning and here God is showing you that your morning could've (and should've) been much different. And tomorrow, the headlines will read "Florida Skies Painted with Scores of Rainbows!" ;-) ~just kidding. I pray that the next time I start to get bent out of shape and feel psycho mom emerging that God will remind me of the three rainbows and how much better it feels to have His peace than to have all that chaos and anger. I know that all I have to do at that moment of choice is ask Him to give me His peace and he will and how much more pleased with me will he be than if I choose my own way of handling things.
Here is one more picture. One of Emma after Taylor had stomped away. Shows exactly what she thought of my picture taking! :-)
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